Mmouse Enterprises Chairman’s Centre
Knoxville, Tennesse
July 7, 2020
6:30pm
(JM = Jeff Murrey)
*Chairman Murrey approaches the podium*
JM: Thank you, members of the press, for joining me yet again. I hope to make this a weekly press conference from now until the launch of our next season. It has been a very busy and fast-paced past few days of news in the wrestling world and I can’t convey enough how excited we are in the PWI to be gearing up for the next Season! Things are coming together nicely and I am excited to announce a new contract signing at this moment. To the tune of a 55 Million Dollar contract, the PWI has signed the former MMA talent as well as another military veteran to our ranks: Bobby Lashley! Bobby is a fierce and talented powerhouse the likes of which I am sure Brock Lesnar will be personally interested in meeting in the coming season.
Additionally, some more updates to the situation regarding Ascendants and its now-confirmed direct competition with EWA’s “Dark”. I am glad that Benny decided to meet my challenge, especially since he knew I had successfully backed him into a corner. Whether he wanted to or not, the PWI was going to challenge him directly. I look forward to this increasingly exciting competition.
To spice things up, I am taking this moment to announce a few new developments with regard to PWI programming. For starters, starting with our television premiere for the Fourth Season, there will be a requirement for at least one title defense on EVERY PWI show and every championship MUST be defended no less than ONCE A MONTH. Likewise, the top ranked superstar or tag team – which, remember, excludes the champions – must be afforded a shot at the primary championship of their division after a month, provided that they can hold on to that ranking for at least a month.
Finally, I am now taking this time to unveil a seventh and final championship in PWI: the Ascendant Championship! This will be a men’s championship, given the fact that the women’s roster of PWI is small enough that they have more than ample opportunity to climb the ranks of their division. However, considering the size of the men’s division, the multi-tier system more affects the men than the women, preventing countless talented stars from ever having a shot at glory.
What makes the Ascendant Championship special is that it will be an automatic ticket to the Top Tier should the holder thereof maintain their status champion for three consecutive months, or 12 weeks, uninterrupted. If they hold it at least two consecutive months, or 8 weeks, they will have the option to ascend to the Second Tier, and holding the championship for at least one month or 4 consecutive weeks will entitle them to an automatic rematch for the gold. Finally, one more note: if the Champion chooses to try and go for FOUR consecutive months or 16 uninterrupted weeks, then he will be entitled to an automatic World Championship shot upon completion of that reign. Like I said before, these are very exciting times in the PWI. Now, on to some brief questions before I continue to go about some important business.
NBC Sports: Is the creation of the Ascendant Championship something which was created as a response to what Benny said about bring PPV caliber shows with each episode of EWA programming?
JM: Yes and no. The reason I say “No” is that we have actually been considering this championship since about January, but we felt at the time that there wasn’t enough time in the Third Season to establish its prestige. Granted, the numerous privileges which accompany the championship were all envisioned over time, but the title has been a part of Board discussions since then. I say “yes”, though, because Benny’s response last night compelled the Board and I to finalize our decision and make this announcement right now.
Sports Illustrated: Aren’t you afraid of the fact that PWI has more championships than any Mmouse Enterprises wrestling brand since the USWA when there were almost a dozen championships?
JM: That was obviously part of our discussion in the Board since we first conceived this idea back in January. We are aware of the image which accompanies the background of this company and its track record for what seemed like a million and a half championships. However, there is a significant difference compared to back then: each championship in PWI has a specific purpose and high level of prestige which accompanies it. The men’s division and the women’s division each have a division main championship, an immunity championship, and tag team championships. The Ascendant superstars deserve a chance to wear some gold to help build their status and prepare them for the next level.
CBS Sports: Aren’t you concerned with the confusion which some members of the audience may have in following all of this?
JM: I’m sure there will be some confusion at first, but that’s why it is our responsibility to clearly explain the prestige of each championship and expose the audience to the champions as much as possible. Let the viewer know that these goals are truly coveted and that they mean something in the grand scheme of things. Despite the fact that the USWA was the most revolutionizing force of sports entertainment after the WWF, of course, even with their plethora of championships, the slew of straps that Mickey doled out to his favorite stars meant very little with few exceptions. I don’t think anyone can seriously claim that any of our championships are meaningless in the current era. Next question.
ESPN: I want to touch base with the signing of Bobby Lashley as well as the rest of the talent that PWI has brought on board in the past week; does Benny have a point with his criticism about PWI spending money on new talent just to keep losing?
JM: I must take issue with the framing of that question. It is almost like you read it from a script provided to you by Chris Hyatte or something. The fact is that PWI swiftly closed the ratings gap as we ended the previous season. We also only had 7 head-to-head match-ups against the EWA. If anyone honestly believes that the PWI will not be able to continue that momentum to the point of actually winning against EWA then you have obviously not been paying attention to the history of this business. I have to remind all of you that I also had a significant winning streak over Mickey and Benny. For two and a half months, the Last Wrestling Federation stood undefeated in early to mid-2004 against the UWF and the UWA.
There were critics at the time who began to wonder if there was any stopping the LWF. Guess what happened: the LWF eventually lost in the ratings war and the playing was balanced yet again. The HCW experienced a similar streak of victories in 2008 and 2009, and it was again openly asked if Brown could be stopped until the UWA actually got control of their direction and became competitive again. My point is that it always seems in this industry like there is some unstoppable force, until they are proven stoppable.
ESPN: …what about the USWA from 1998-2002…
JM: With all due respect, there are no follow-up questions…next question.
Pro Wrestling Illustrated: Chairman Murrey, I received a bit of a leak of information this morning which unveiled something very interesting. It appears that Miss Alexa Bliss used her brief powers as “Boss of the Day” on Motivation 7’s Night Two to make some important permanent changes in the rules in order to benefit herself. Can you confirm this report?
JM: I’m not sure who leaked that to you, but it is a developing matter that we are trying to handle as quickly as possible.
FOX Sports: I received word of that same leak of information, sir…
JM: Really…
FOX Sports:…from what I learned, Alexa managed to insert into the rules that Slammer will be shielded from punishment for protecting her by any means necessary so long as she enlists his services. Is there truth to this? Is it possible that the Premier Athlete can make such long-term changes to the rules? Is this a loophole the Board plans to address?
JM: OKAY!! That’s a lot to unpack, people! Like I said, the situation with Alexa’s abuse of her single-day powers is being dealt with. We will get back to you when we have some more updates on the matter.
HBO Sports: Sir, is it safe to assume that the “Boss for a Day” privilege will be reconsidered in the upcoming season? Or at least reformed to limit and clarify its power?
JM: There are no plans to eliminate this power at this time, but we are working on a fair approach to clarifying the authority bestowed upon the Premier Athlete if they so choose to exploit it.
*PRESS SHOUTS MORE QUESTIONS ABOUT ALEXA BLISS*
JM: Jesus Christ!! Are there any questions remaining which don’t involve Alexa Bliss?!
RT: Yes sir, do you have any news about Mickey?
JM: What is it with you Russians?! Now I know why Mickey tried to ban you all. I’m out of here, I will see you all in a week!! *Storms off the stage as press clamors for more answers*